Posted by: hellonhairylegs | August 28, 2008

Got Some Explainin’ to Do

I don’t generally do the handholding along the Cookie Crumb Trail routine, but I figured I should make an exception in this case. I titled my August ninth post “Fuck. I Hate Men,” only half joking. It was in response to accounts of forced abortion in China and to the conflict between Russia and Georgia. I was lashing out in disgust, frustration and fear, which really isn’t an excuse. I am a feminist, and whether I like it or not people will interpret my words as speaking for feminists. So let me make this clear: the vast majority of feminists do not hate men. As noted by the Feminism 101 crowd, Feminists hate misogyny, not men.

I don’t hate men, if only because having a deep and abiding personal hatred for each and every one of you would be a waste of my time and emotional energy. I recognise the statement “I hate men” is a little unfair, unaugmented. Even after a few thousand years of oppression I don’t want to condemn an entire group of people based on a chromosome. I am angry, angry at a lot of you. I am angry that I’m treated as a sex object, angry that I know far too many rape survivors, angry that I will not receive equal pay or equal respect for equal work. I’m angry that my identity is supposed to shift with my marital status, angry that I can’t actually get married because of the bogus gender binary, angry that marriage is such a crappy oppressive institution. I’m angry at being othered, being the deviant, angry how my otherness impacts negatively on my health care and my right to bodily integrity. Yes, I’m angry.

There is a difference between anger and hatred, a difference between an oppressive system and an oppressor class. So men, by all means, become allies, help us in the struggle against the patriarchy. You can participate in this fight and I welcome you.



  1. I qualify it like this: I like humans. Males are humans. So are females. Men and women are constructs. I hate constructs. I especially hate constructs that oppress other constructs. So, I hate men.

    And if that is above their thinking capacity, then I let them believe that I really do go around hacking off wieners with a machete in my free time in the hope that it will keep them away from me lest the stupid is contagious.

  2. I’m a man that hate all men who depreciate women (make sex object of them and all of the above). I also don’t want to end up in an abstract deck like “all men” and be hated like one of them. Out of curiosity, do you share the same abversion as myself to the seduction sites? They claim females flee away when they smell desire in a man. (This is not good. why is their desire better than ours “a priori”?) They also say they prefer a don john who disguise his desire in self confidence. mah.
    Suggestion: approciate you first sometimes.

  3. Seems like a good system Jenn.

    Yes Anto I think seduction sites are sinkoles of misogyny.

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